Being a military family comes with a great deal of responsibilities. Some people think that only the service member is the one making sacrifices and working hard to be able to support his family. Let me tell you, my friends, that these people should start reconsidering those ideas because they are far away from the truth.
I had the opportunity to be in both sides of the court. I was first a service member and then, I became a military wife. I have experienced life in both ways of the equation and even when life at the center of the action was way more exciting than being at the home front, when I had the chance to become a full-time Army wife, I couldn’t believe the “mess” I had gotten myself into. Not all the experiences I had as a military wife were challenging, but, oh boy! I have to say that some of them really were.
If you don’t know what military spouses go through during their career at the home front, continue reading. Below, I will share with you eight (8) situations why being a military spouse is not an easy task to complete.
1) Their life and their children’s lives revolve around the service member’s career.
2) Their lives’ decisions depend on what is that the government thinks is best for them.
3) There is a big chance they will never get to have a real career. The fact is that moving around every 3-4 years may never give them the chance to develop a career on their own. They will probably find “jobs” but building a career may be a little more difficult to accomplish for a military wife than for a regular civilian wife.
4) If deployments are difficult, in some cases, homecomings are even more difficult than the actual deployment. Getting adjusted to the “family” life again could be very demanding not only for the service member but also for the spouse who was left behind (for months, and in some cases, even years) to deal with the family issues all by herself/himself.
5) Military spouses don’t get the luxury to plan things in advance; not even the places in where they would like to raise their children. Again, everything revolves around the service member’s schedule and the overly used statement… “the needs of the government.”
6) Every single item they own as a family will come in and out of a box every 3-4 years. And, in some cases, not everything will come out of the box in one single piece; if you know what I mean.
7) Dealing with family issues could be very emotionally demanding, especially while the service member is deployed. The military is known for moving military families every 3-4 years and sometimes, to places very far away from their real homes. When problems arise, military spouses, in most of the cases, don’t have the close support that other regular spouses will have; like having friends and other family members close to them who can help them out in moments of need. For most of the part, military spouses have to rely on complete strangers when having to deal with difficult situations away from home.
8) Having to deal with the bureaucracy and the “silliness” that sometimes military life (especially during service member’s deployments) has to offer could be a very stressful times; not only for the service member, but also for the military spouses that, in most cases, don’t even understand why they are been “treated” like second class citizen by the government. Yes, there are a lot of non-sense things happening around them, and for most of the part; they don’t even have an idea why things are happening the way they are; unless they are active in the military community. But, let’s be honest; who has time for than when you are basically running a household by yourself?
There you have it, my friends. Were you curious about that military life as a spouse was all about? Well, you just had a piece of it. And, that’s not even including some other “sensitive” issues that I rather not discuss in this article because, at the end, it may get my husband to lose his job.
The truth is that being a military spouse is one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I have met very good friends throughout our “military career” and I have had the opportunity to visit some amazing places as the result of our 3-4 year PCSs. The problem I have with this life is that as a military spouse, I have zero control of what goes on around me, and for a control freak like me… that is a very difficult thing to digest.
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