Three married middle-aged CPAs wanted to recapture spring break, this time in Hawaii. They got more than they bargained for on the Friday, April 24 episode of “Hawaii Five-0.” Comedians Pauly Shore, Jaleel White (Steve Urkel from “Family Matters”), and Kevin Farley (younger brother of the late Chris Farley from “SNL”), starred in “Hoʻamoano” (“Chasing Yesterday”). In a rare moment of comic relief, the Hawaiian TV drama on CBS also interspersed it with a separate crime subplot, the series usual fare. Most of the focus was on the trio of certified public accountants from Cleveland.
The show opened like it always does with a life in paradise marred by murder. This time it showed a hotel room completely trashed with three very hung-over 40-something guys. One is about to take a shower when he finds a dead woman in their bathtub with a gunshot wound to the head. Instead of calling the police, who would only alert their wives and spoil their plans of hooking up with beautiful bikini babes, they came up with another plan. Steve McGarrett and Danno were called to the scene at one of the state parks on Oahu. They found a partially filled grave with the murder victim. The three unlikely older spring breakers were now in handcuffs.
Back at Five-0 headquarters the three were individually interrogated separately by McGarrett, Danno, and Grover. All of them basically said the same thing of not remembering what happened the night before, and they certainly did not commit murder. One explained to the Five-0 Task Force they were wanting to breakout of their dull routine and mid-life crisis of crunching numbers and being stuck in a cubicle all day long. They came to Hawaii for an adventure. McGarrett and Danno listened to a voice mail message from one of the men’s wives, while a baby was crying in the background. She was furious with her husband not returning her calls. This wife seemed to catch on to their real plans, which didn’t include wild boar hunting.
Max Bergman, the medical examiner, discovered the murder victim had put up a struggle with the perpetrator, which meant they would have scarring somewhere on their face, arms, or other parts of the body. He found traces of glitter on the victim. The three men had ingested “k” or ketamine which causes amnesia. It’s also a popular club drug. It was decided by the team to re-trace the steps of the men’s night out.
First stop was their hotel’s poolside where a wild Spring Break party was already happening. The three men didn’t score any action, only bothered the waitresses and patrons to no end. Another stop was a nightclub where they bought drinks for all the ladies in the house. They all drank up and got away from the three older men as quickly as possible. After being beyond obnoxious to patrons and the wait staff, the bouncer punched one of them in the eye during a drunken altercation. They were thrown out onto the sidewalk. One decided to take a fire baton from a sidewalk performer and singed his hair, a la Michael Jackson. When the three amigos recovered from their humiliation and injuries, they discovered a dance club called the Glitter Ball.
Opening the scene was the Mark Ronson featuring Hawaii’s own Bruno Mars massive hit song “Uptown Funk.” There was a huge crowd of Spring Break clubbers partying and chanting “Flop.” At the top of a high deck was one of the CPA’s (Kevin Farley) ready to belly flop in a pool of balloons and beach balls. He actually went for it and the place went crazy. The murder victim had been a server at the Glitter Ball. She had already left the club well before the three men.
It turns out the murder victim was about to meet her biological father after all these years. Her long-lost half-brother resented the fact she was going to cut into his $20 million inheritance. The security cameras caught him going into the club. McGarrett, Danno, and Grover discovered scratch marks on the perpetrator’s forearm and glitter residue on his clothing and hair. The three CPAs were escorted by Grover to the airport and told them they were lucky this time. If they ever come back to Hawaii they’ll be arrested. Only one more episode left before the two-hour season finale of “Hawaii Five-0.”
