Recently, a friend on social media shared a picture of a woman proposing to a man. This obviously sparked a conversation about whether or not this should be done. While many things have changed over time, as equality has become a part of our daily conversation, some traditions should never, ever die.
So many react with a feminist mindset that women should be able to do whatever men do, including propose. However, just because a woman can do something doesn’t mean that it’s in her best interest to do it. There are some things a man should just always be required to do, and one of those things should be to ask a woman’s hand in marriage. By doing so, he’s accepting the responsibility like a man. When a woman proposes, it’s almost the equivalent to a mother telling her teenaged son to clean his room. He doesn’t really want to do it if he doesn’t have to, he might do it just to shut you up, but eventually, it’s gonna be a mess all over again.
Let’s consider what a man is saying when he proposes to a woman:
· He’s telling her parents that he’s now responsible for taking care of their daughter
· He’s willing to assume headship of a family
· He’s willing to be both protector and provider for her and any children they may have
· He understands all of these things, and he’s not only willing and able to carry them out, but he’s so ready to do so, he considers it a privilege
A woman proposing to a man is basically forcing all of these things on to someone that’s obviously not ready, because if he were, he’d either propose on his own, or tell a proposing woman to wait until he’s ready to do so. Men don’t respond well to relationship pressure at any level, and forcing one into marriage doesn’t cure this. It actually emasculates him, and what woman wants to marry a man like that?
Consider the fact that men struggle to commit even after having sex with a woman that they’re not in a relationship with. With that information before us, the idea of dragging him to the altar makes little to no sense. It seems that if a woman asks a man to marry her, she’s decided that she doesn’t want to wait forever, she doesn’t want to lose what she supposedly has, and she’s put in so much time and effort, that it’d be a shame to come away without at least a shot at the title.
But no matter what the commitment in life, most men must be prepared and willing to take on the challenge. Forcing a man into anything before he’s ready drastically increases the chances that he’ll fail, or quit, or whatever else we’d like to use for throwing in the towel.
Sometimes, a man is simply waiting to do it the right way, with the right ring, and in the right circumstances. Women must be patient and allow the fairytale to happen. However, there are times when he didn’t ask because, quite honestly, the woman he’s with isn’t the one. In that case, if he won’t propose, why try and make him marry you anyway?
How a marriage starts often determines how it will go. If there’s infidelity that isn’t addressed and cleared up before the nuptials, there’s likely to be a continuation. If there’s verbal and/or physical abuse, marriage won’t cure it. And if a woman starts off by assuming the man’s role in something as monumental as a marriage proposal, she can be sure that she’ll be putting on his shoes throughout the marriage. For however long it lasts.